Face it, boats require maintenance, and there’s nothing more disappointing than that first scratch or scuff. To fix it, there are zillions of magic potions that are absolutely guaranteed to make your boat shine, rid it of dirt or grease, keep some surfaces slippery and others non-slippery, and do everything but pop corn.
But a quick walk through your big box marine hardware store can fill your cart and empty your wallet quickly. Wait, before you hand over your credit card, take a peek under your kitchen sink at home, on the shelves in your garage, or even in your pantry. The following is a selection of household products that handle the same boating needs as those “magic potions,” but for pennies on the dollar. Go forth and scrub!
Baking Soda: We all know that stainless steel isn’t. So, when you see those irritating rust stains, dig out your box of Arm & Hammer, mix up a poultice (1 tbsp soda to 1 tsp water), and wipe down the problem. Buff it clean with a dry paper towel for a sparkling sheen.
Baking Soda (again): Yep, we all spill gas on deck while refueling when the tank burps. Sprinkle baking soda on the spot, let sit for 30-60 minutes, and rinse all the gas (and the fumes!!) away. Got gas on your hands? Rub baking soda between your palms and wipe them with a damp rag or paper towel.
Crayons: Pilfer your kid’s box of Crayolas to keep the zippers zipping on everything, from your dodger to your helm cover. Choose a color that matches, use it sparingly, work the zippers a bunch, voila!
Lemon Juice: Sacrifice that lemon you’d been saving for Dark and Stormies, squeeze the juice onto a rag, and you can wipe away the black scuffs on your hull from fenders, docks, and dinghies.
Vinegar: Tired of water spots (both salt and fresh) on your windows? A rag dipped in white vinegar cuts through the mineral deposits.
Hairspray: Did some thoughtless soul leave a ballpoint pen mark on your otherwise flawless upholstery? Spray it with hairspray (the cheapest stuff with lots of alcohol content), sit for a few moments, and wipe away the mark.
Toothpaste: Just looking at Plexiglas and Lucite can leave scratches, but you can just squirt some non-gel toothpaste on it (Mint Colgate smells good), give it a quick buff, no scratches.
Peanut Butter: Use peanut butter (non-chunky, duh!) just like the above-mentioned toothpaste to remove scratches in clear cockpit enclosures and plastic portholes.
Lime-Away-Bathroom Cleaner: Your hull is flawless, except for the rusty dribbles around the transom exhaust. Spray this on, let it sit a couple of minutes, and then rinse it (a lot, because it’s a powerful acid) to end the stains.
Chapstick: Besides saving your lips, this is the ideal lube for the recalcitrant zippers on your foulies. Use it sparingly. Bonus: it makes sticky drawers slide, too.
Wonder Bread: Weird, but true: this plain white bread, sometimes referred to (by my wife) as “rat bread” literally sucks lipstick off fabrics. Just wad up some bread and use it like a doughy eraser. We’re not going to ask whose lipstick or why it’s on the cushions.
Club Soda: Really? If you didn’t already know this, you’ve never been to a party, but club soda removes red wine stains from just about everything from carpets to clothing. Best if it’s still fizzy.
Hydrogen Peroxide: For particularly tough stains on white vinyl cushions, including flotation cushions, mix 1 tsp of ammonia, ¼ cup of hydrogen peroxide, and ¾ cup of distilled water. For some magical reason, the bubbling of the peroxide seems to float away stubborn blemishes. Tip: first, try it in an invisible spot as a test. And ask yourself why you ordered white cushions!
Petroleum Jelly: A light film of petroleum jelly (you know it as Vaseline) is a great way to protect metal parts during the offseason. It can also serve as “masking tape” when painting around metal fittings. Coat the fitting carefully with the jelly so the paint won’t stick, and you can rinse off the jelly later with warm water, leaving a perfect paint job.
Meat Tenderizer: An unflavored meat tenderizer (She Who Must Be Obeyed prefers McCormicks) will eliminate blood stains from upholstery. Wet the spot with cold (never ever hot!) water, sprinkle on the tenderizer, let it sit a couple of minutes, and wipe away the bloodshed. Again, always try an obscure test first. I’ve also used McCormick’s to remove my clumsy foredeck crew’s bloodstains on Dacron sails long after a frantic headsail change.
MHPS Winter 2025
